17 Months and Counting!

In September 2005 we made the decision to adopt our daughter from China. We filled out our agency application and then began our paperchase for documents for the dossier. We had our home study visits, background checks, and multiple fingerprinting appointments. In March 2006, after finally receiving all of our paperwork from our government and our social workers, we made the trip to Columbus to have everything authenticated by the state. Then, we paid a courier to take everything to the Chinese Consulate to have the papers authenticated by them. On March 23, 2006 our dossier was on it's way to China and on April 7, 2006 we were logged in to begin our wait for our daughter. At that time, our agency (along with everyone else) thought we would wait anywhere from 6-9 months to receive our referral for our daughter.

Now, here we are 17 months later, still waiting. I have had people ask me why we haven't given up on the China Adoption program and there is one simple answer...our daughter is in China. There is not an hour that goes by that I don't think of Olivia and there is never a night that I don't dream about her. How long will we wait...until we get to see her beautiful face. Yes, we are praying for sooner, rather than later, but we will wait as long as it takes to bring our daughter home.

Water Balloons Part 3

This is the last team from our ATV Water Balloon Joust.

Water Balloons Part 2

Water Balloons and ATV's

Almost every Memorial and Labor Day we go camping with family. Typically it is very hot with not a lot of shade, so a couple of years ago we came up with a fun way to cool off and pass the time. We jokingly call this water balloon jousting...

CCAA Referrals

The CCAA has updated their website and has referred through November 25, 2007. Of course, this only leaves 132 LID's ahead of us (how sad).

Here is what the CCAA website says:

The CCAA has finished the review of the adoption application documents registered with our office before June 30, 2006.
The CCAA has finished the placement of children for the families whose adoption application documents were registered with our office before November 25, 2005.

They Say...

I read this on http://heartmindandseoul.typepad.com/weblog/ and wanted to share it. The blog owner is an international adoptee and also a parent of an internationally adopted child. If you get a chance, check out her blog as she great information that every adoptive parent should know.

They say...
They say I was just a baby, what possibly could I know?
They say I was just a baby, what possibly could I feel?
They say I was just a baby, what possibly could I remember?
They say I was just a baby, how much would I really lose?
They say I was just a baby, and that I wouldn't really notice.
They say I was just a baby, and that I wouldn't really care.
They say I was just a baby, and that it wouldn't really matter.
They say I was just a baby, and that she could be replaced.
They say I was just a baby, and that I wouldn't crave her touch.
They say I was just a baby, and that I wouldn't miss her love.
They say I was just a baby, and that time will heal all wounds.
They say I was just a baby, and that I'd never know any different.
They say I was just a baby, and that life would go on as planned.
They say I was just a baby, and that the pain could be loved away.
They say I was just a baby, and that I'd never feel as if I'd ever lost her.

Copied with the owner's permission.

Oops - I Missed our 16-Month LID Anniversary

We just returned from a wonderful, relaxing vacation in Mexico and I realized that I had not updated our blog for our 16-month LID anniversary (August 7). Actually, the date passed while we were relaxing away and I didn't even think about it until we got home. However, not a day went by that I didn't think about Olivia and continue to wait for her to come home to her forever family.

CCAA Website has been Updated

Well, the rumor was true and the cut-off date is November 21, 2005.
Directly from the CCAA website:

The CCAA has finished the review of the adoption application documents registered with our office before June 30, 2006.
The CCAA has finished the placement of children for the families whose adoption application documents were registered with our office before November 21, 2005.

Congratulations to all of the families who received their referrals!

Referral Rumor

I came home from work today and heard that referrals are arriving! Supposedly the cut-off date is November 21, 2005 which means that there are now only 136 days of log in dates in front of us. Even though that is a lot of days, at least now there are less.

June 2006 Through Review

I get excited every time the CCAA updates their website. Well, sometime last night they updated the document processing to state that through June 30, 2006 was through review. Congratulations to everyone with a June 06 LID on making it through the review room!

Recommendations for Adoptive Parents

I read this on http://wraithswrealm.com/blog/2007/02/11/recommendations-for-adoptive-parents-revisited/ and wanted to share it...

• Educate yourself, read every book you can find on adoptees and on being an adoptive parent. (If you need any recommendations, ask me)
• Decide now, if you are doing this for a child, or for yourself. (Is it about image or love? Is it about your own needs, to be a parent, to be needed, to fit in society?)
• Mourn what you may not have. (As in blood children of their own.)
• Never say, “We love you as our own.” The adoptee will be your child and that’s a mixed message if there ever was one.
• Don’t overdo the “you are so special/lucky” thing. They aren’t going to feel that, so actions will speak louder than words.
• Always be there for them, they may have anxiety when you leave them at daycare, or anywhere else. This is normal for most kids, but often worse for an adoptee.
• Join a support group, somewhere they can play with other adopted kids and you can talk about your life with your child.
• Love them unconditionally. Even when they shout you are not my family. Even more so then.
• Find out everything you can about your child’s heritage and family and try to incorporate some of it into your own.
• Allow them to freedom to explore their history as well as yours.
• Don’t take it personal if they decide to search for their blood. It’s not about you or something you did wrong, it’s about wanting to know where you came from. After all, you probably know where you came from right?
• Be honest in all things. Don’t LIE to your adopted child about their origins.
• Love them, UNCONDITIONALLY.
• If a member of the birth family comes around searching, be honest and truthful with the adoptee about it. Let them make the decision or if still very young, ask their opinion. Don’t hold it against them and don’t think you need to “defend” your child from these people. After all, from a biological stand point, your child is theirs as well.
• If the adoptee is reunited, try to not hold animosity toward the birth family. Also understand that the adoptee may spend more time with them for a while. He or she hasn’t forgotten you, they are just reveling in something new, like looking at someone who looks like them. (Want to know what I mean? If you are ever around a bunch of adoptees and one of them just reunited and is showing pictures, the first comment is probably going to be “Wow, you look just like them.” It’s one of the first things we notice, because we don’t see it in ourselves.)
• Encourage them to talk about adoption and their birth family. Never give them any sense that it is not okay to talk about it -by a look, tone of voice, etc.
• Do not expect that if you “love them enough” that will solve magically solve all adoption issues that they might have.
• Never say anything negative about the birth family. Part of their identity comes from their birth family. Insulting the birth family is like insulting the child.
• Never “make up” anything about the birth family. If you do, it may come back to bite you later.
• Encourage contact with the birth family. Never withhold any letters, pictures, etc. unless it is necessary for safety concerns.
• Do not wait to “tell” a child they are adopted. Make it something that they have always known.
• Never say “I understand how you feel or I know what you are going through.” Unless you have been adopted yourself, and even then, you have no way of truly understanding the pain and hurt that an adoptee may be feeling.
• LOVE THEM, UNCONDITIONALLY.
• Validate the adoptees feelings. Just like every other human, we have feelings such as pain and loss and should be allowed to feel them and work through them, not bury them. Comments like “get over it” just say that you aren’t willing to allow us to process and we need to hide our true feelings from you.
  

Transracial Adoption

Please read this amazing essay written by an 8th grade girl adopted from Vietnam.

http://kadnexus.wordpress.com/2007/06/04/my-sisters-adoption-essay/

"Accidental" Adoptions

I read this on one of my yahoo groups and wanted to share it.


Have you ever noticed that you hear all the time about "accidental" pregnancies, but never about couples who experience "accidental"adoptions?

Can you imagine:

Honey, sit down. I have some news for you.

What is it?

Well, I don't know how to say this, so I'll just come out with it. I went out to the mailbox today and ... well, we got an I-171H.

A what?!? An I171H? As in, we're going to have another baby?!?

It looks that way.

But how? We've been so careful! I put away all the blank I600A forms. Didn't you hide our home study update?

Of course I did. But don't forget, there was that one night...

What night? (pauses) Ohhh, that night. But it was only once. We were just messing around. I didn't print clearly. I didn't even use ink! (pauses again) But it was kind of fun.

(giggles) It was, wasn't it? I'll never forget how cute you looked getting your fingerprints.

So now we've got our I-171H, eh? But that doesn't always mean you'll adopt, does it? I mean, shouldn't you see the agency or something, make sure everything's okay?

I already did.

And?

I'm five documents along.

Five documents! And they're all notarized, certified and authenticated okay?

Just great. There was one small scare when the agency couldn't seethe notary's middle initial, but it showed up just fine under the magnifying glass.

Thank God. And you, honey? Are you feeling okay?

I'm feeling fine. As long as I know you're happy about this.

Happy? I'm thrilled! It's always a shock at first when something like this happens, but of course I'm happy!

Interactive Map of China

I found this link on the RQ forum and thought I would share it with everyone. The link will allow you to click on any Province in China and learn more about the area.

http://easia.imb.org/peopleplaces/province.htm

This will be neat to have once we figure out what part of China Olivia is coming from.

LID Anniversary

Today is our 15 month anniversary for our LID. If I believed some of the agencies out there, I would think that I only had 3 more months to wait. I wish...

CCAA has Updated their Website

It's official...the CCAA has referred children to families who have LID's through November 14, 2005.

Directly from the CCAA website...

The CCAA has finished the review of the adoption application documents registered with our office before May 31, 2006.
The CCAA has finished the placement of children for the families whose adoption application documents were registered with our office before November 14, 2005.

What this means to us is that there are 143 days of LID's before they get to us. I am really hoping, although not holding my breath, that the CCAA speeds up referrals.

Congratulations Anita and Dan & Referral Rumors

I happy to announce that May has made it through the review room. This is important to us because our friends Dan and Anita have a May LID. It took almost 4 months for April to make it through the review and only 2 weeks for May to get through. Maybe this means a speed up for referrals will be coming soon.

On the rumor front for referrals the news is not great. According to some agencies the CCAA has only referred families with LID's through November 14, 2005. This is only 6 measly days of referrals. I am praying that the wait speeds up and we do not have to wait another year to see our daughters face.

Directly from the CCAA website:
The CCAA has finished the review of the adoption application documents registered with our office before May 31, 2006.
The CCAA has finished the placement of children for the families whose adoption application documents were registered with our office before November 7, 2005.

Sad Day

It has been a sad day in our house. I had to come home from work early because one of our horses has been very sick and the vet needed to come see her again. So far, the horse is fine, although still very sick, but the day got worse. As the vet left, we noticed a white cat laying in the yard. Our poor Nella had been hit by a car and didn't make it.

So, my day was spent spraying water on a sick horse to keep her fever down and digging a grave for our Nella cat. I hope she is enjoying herself in Heaven and is happy.

Of the five cats in the picture, there are only 3 left. Rascal disappeared about 1 1/2 years ago (he is one of the black cats in the picture) and Nella was the white cat.

WE ARE OUT OF REVIEW!!!!!!!

I checked the CCAA website and we are officially out of review. Now...let's bring Olivia home!


The CCAA has finished the review of the adoption application documents registered with our office before April 30, 2006.

LID Anniversary

Fourteen months ago the CCAA received our dossier and logged it in. Today, according to their website, we are still not even out of review. At the rate that everything is going I am now beginning to wonder if we are ever going to see our daughter.

I made a trip to Toy's R Us today to buy birthday gifts for Cole, Katie and Reese. Of course I had to buy something for Olivia while I was there. As I was walking through the infant section I saw a John Deere rattle that had a tractor on it with a cute pink teddy bear riding in it. Since J is such a huge John Deere fan I had to buy it, even if Olivia will probably not use it.